A week of innocent Venezuelans being trafficked to El Salvador, the first US attack on Iran, and the Supreme Court protecting Trump

Hi, I’m Marcela: I’m a comedian, I live in Brooklyn, and I really like to tell people how to feel about the news. After wowing zoomers all over on TikTok by giving them news with a sense of humour and anarchy, I decided to start a weekly Sunday newsletter to share my feelings about more news. 

My newsletter has evolved into this beautiful news column for shado which also covers international news. I hope the newsletter keeps you informed and makes you laugh a little. We live in hell and I believe humour helps keep this place a little bit cooler.

Today I’m sharing my feelings about learning that most of the Venezuelans trafficked to El Salvador didn’t have criminal records, the first US attack on Iran, and the US Supreme court limiting federal courts’ power to rein in Trump.

Onto the news… 

News that made me scream ABOLISH ALL PRISONS!

Remember those traumatising photos and videos of the Venezuelan men labeled as “gang members” by the Trump administration where their hair was shaved, dressed in white, and sitting on cement? The Trump administration used these men’s gang “affiliation” as a justification for their lifetime sentences in a concentration camp in El Salvador known as CECOT.

Based on that justification, Trump should send himself to El Salvador and lock himself in a cell for the rest of his life for being part of the war criminal gang known as The Presidents of the United States of America. Trump is obviously never going to go to prison for his crimes because prison has been abolished for the most dangerous criminals in our society. That’s the result of the most dangerous criminals in our society running said prisons.

Trump can now add ‘sending people who he knew were not criminals to prisons to excite his racist base’ on his ever growing criminal record. Yes! The Trump administration knew most of the 238 people who were trafficked to El Salvador didn’t have criminal records. At this point Trump will need a data centre to store his rap sheet. I’m not shocked by this news at all because when was the last time Trump ever let the truth get between him and his racism?

Thirty of the men were convicted of a crime in the United States and twenty were convicted or arrested in Latin American countries. Even if all these men had a criminal history, WE SHOULDN’T BE LOCKING UP PEOPLE IN CAGES, PERIOD! NOT DOMESTICALLY, NOT ABROAD, NOWHERE! Sorry I had to scream that. It is exhausting listening to people condone incarceration for “bad” people in the name of safety.

There is no amount of caging other humans that will make us safe. In fact, caging other humans prevents us from being safe, as it prevents us from solving the problems which ail our society like capitalism and low rise jeans. Maybe the invention of pants that don’t have enough space for people’s butts (by people I mean me) is more of a symptom of a toxic society and less of a cause, but I, nonetheless, wanted to name it.

When criminality is used to excuse the violation of human rights, scoundrels like Donald Trump can utilise this as a premise to further their racist agendas. To be clear, Donald Trump is simply following the American tradition of criminalising people who are not white to reify their mistreatment and position as second-class citizens.

If Trump kidnapped 238 brown men and said he was sending them to a concentration camp because they are not white, and he wants to create an environment of fear for anyone who is not white – a lot of people would be up in arms. Trump’s racist constituents would celebrate by drinking gasoline. I don’t know what racists do to celebrate but drinking gasoline makes sense: it’s bad for the planet and Anthony Fauci wouldn’t approve. We know racists hate the planet and Fauci.

News that made me share my journal with everyone

My friend sent me a headline today that stated Trump says the US has completed air strikes on Iran. Not Trump just sent bombs that could have killed Iranians. Thankfully no one was killed in the strike. If the writer who wrote this heartless headline wanted to use fancier words with better syntax to highlight their prestigious academic upbringing devoid of all sense of humanity or morality because Western media has taught them “neutrality,” it would still sound terrible. 

Whiteness is when the fancy pen in your purse matters more than the life of a full human who falls outside the definition of the class of humanity which has been created to justify murdering people for fancy pens. I mean, you can’t write without your fancy pen, but there is a cost to everything, right? Good thing it doesn’t cost you anything other than moments of discomfort at brunch with friends when the people who you are murdering for your pens show you the source of your fancy pens. You scream at them and tell them to shut up.

Sometimes you tell them to shut up loudly, because you don’t care if the people you kill for the pens know you hate them. You think they deserve to die because their existence is beneath yours and their purpose for living is absolutely so you can have fancy pens. If they don’t want to give you fancy pens and be happy about it, then they might as well be omitted from the headline about the missile that will kill them. Telling them to shut up loudly looks like you waking up in the morning sharing images of their death and saying things like this pen matters more than their lives or if only they would just stick to making pens, then none of this would happen.

Sometimes you tell them to shut up quietly. You feel bad because you really like your pen and aren’t willing to give it up, but it makes you feel uncomfortable because you want to be a good person. Being a good person means you should feel badly about holding a bloody pen. But can the blood please stop dripping onto your hand while you try to write a cheque to some politician who has promised you he will make sure the blood on your pen doesn’t drip on your manicured fingers? Yes, there’ll be blood, but at least it won’t get in the way of you writing your daily schedule.

News that made me feel like you can’t turn a monster into a cute puppy

The Supreme Court shouldn’t exist. No entity that can deprive people’s rights should exist. I know you are thinking: who is going to check the executive branch and the legislative branch? To that, I say my previous sentence about no entity that can deprive humans of their rights existing applies. 

Also, do you really believe these three branches that are controlled by the ruling class are checking each other? The Supreme Court justices, the President and Congress are paid for by billionaires like that one guy who makes people pee in a cup so he can have a fancy wedding in Venice. Shout out to the people in Venice who forced Jeff Bezos to move his wedding to a different venue because they threatened to fill the canals with inflatable crocodiles.

Everyone is panicking about the Supreme Court’s ruling to limit federal judges’ ability to block Trump’s power grab, but not enough people are frightened about the fact that we live in a society where we have to hold our breath while complete strangers who are not accountable to us determine our fates. How are we okay with the reality that we don’t control our own destiny, but people will not tolerate when their Doordasher messes up their orders?

People will write long Yelp reviews about their food being late and cold, but will go to one march and then go home after the Supreme Court repeals their rights to bodily autonomy. Remember that? The Supreme Court said your body is a gestative machine for the state and there wasn’t an uprising. Instead, the conversation turned into if only Obama and Biden would have appointed more Supreme Court justices. How dire is our situation if we have to depend on war criminals to uphold our rights?

Meanwhile, there is very little conversation about how the liberal judges uphold this genocidal autocracy. On June 30th 2025, for example, the Supreme Court ruled without dissent that an imprisoned person “cannot not sue federal officers for assault.” Their rationale? Imprisoned people’s ability to sue federal officers “could have negative systemic consequences for prison officials and the “inordinately difficult undertaking of running a prison.” 

So yes, even the liberal judges think that prisons would be easier to run if the correctional officers can abuse the imprisoned people without fear of redress. This is not a surprise because as we know liberalism is fascism lite. It’s diet coke; genocidal without calories.

My point is that there is no amount of voting that will turn an evil monster into a cuddly puppy. The state doesn’t endow rights, it strips rights – especially a state that is built on genocide and slavery. If you saw an evil monster destroying everything you loved and cared about, your reaction wouldn’t be, let’s get the monster a cute blue leash and make sure only good people would hold it. I’m a vegan but I think it’s okay to end a monster if it’s actively making all of us suffer.

I took a break from the news to remind everyone the origin of policing in the United States

@feelthenewswithmarcela Come to feel the news the comedy show this Saturday June 7th in Brooklyn to deprogram the lies your teachers told you and also laugh with very funny comedians! Get tix in bio #news #jokes #standup #comedians ♬ original sound – Feel the News

See ya later,

Marcela